The world has not been the same since Pluto got demoted from planet to asteroid.
A few months ago I put a horoscope button on my right widget column, mostly so it would be easier for me to check my horoscope. The site doesn’t provide the code, so I had to save their horoscope symbol to disk, then upload it to wordpress with the link attached to it. Not an artistic endeavor, but it got the job done.
Here is my horoscope for this week:
Due to a rare conjunction of three potato-shaped asteroids in your astrological House of Productive and Forgivable Gaffes, you have cosmic license to make a lot of really cool mistakes. I’ve gathered some witty remarks you can invoke to disarm anyone who might be critical of your messy experiments: (1) “You’re just jealous because the little voices are talking to me and not to you.” (2) “When I have to choose between two evils, I enjoy picking the one I’ve never tried before.” (3) “Do you have a clear conscience? A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.” (4) “I don’t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.”
So what is this supposed to mean? After you get done laughing, of course? Potato-shaped asteroids? Since when do potato-shaped asteroids figure in a horoscope?
The Jordan Times used to have a really great horoscope for learning English. Every week I would bring my copy of the paper to class and my English conversation students would pick their horoscope out of the paper and read it to the class, adding a little to their vocabulary in a fun, and therefore easy to remember way. Even the devoutly Moslem in the group found no offense if the horoscopes were read with the understanding that it was for entertainment only. Allah is to be worshipped and not the stars.
Oh, but this horoscope button….I do so look forward to whatever jolt away from the mundane I will experience from it each week, and I suspect they are also quite serious about guiding your life.
~A new widget button: Astroweather